Fiction Freak: GYDO: Romily Bernard

Monday, September 23, 2013

GYDO: Romily Bernard

Romily Bernard, Author of Find Me

An Uncomfortable Realization

I’m not sure if it’s a sign of arrival or imminent collision when a VP at your company swings through the cubicle ghetto to tell you how “great” it is that you’re getting published. I’m really not sure what to make of my reaction either. What should’ve been a pleasant, but forgettable exchange turned into a sweaty, stammery mess.

In other words, it was completely me and another example about why I should never be allowed out in public. How is it possible that I am smart enough to drive a car, read through a contract, and hold down a job…yet I never considered people were going to read my stuff? Even for me, that’s pretty asinine and, when I call something asinine, you can take it to the bank. I know about this stuff.

Now where was I?

Oh, yeah. I was melting down in my cubicle because not only did said VP want to congratulate me, but he also pulled the dreaded follow-up: “So what’s the book about?”

This is never a good topic for thriller writers, but I pulled out my elevator pitch and flung it at him anyway: “Teenage hacker trying to get out of the game gets blackmailed into finding a dead classmate’s rapist.”

VP’s mouth twisted like he’d just swallowed a thumbtack. “Wow. Um, and the next one?”

Crap. Crap. Crap. Accompanying my terror sweats, there was now a rushing in my ears—a sound I could only assume was my corporate career circling the toilet.

“It’s about a serial killer.”

VP blinked, stared at me, blinked again. “Wow, I would never have guessed you were…into that stuff.”

Into that stuff? At first, I was irritated and then I realized ‘oh, wait, I kinda am.’ I have a (perhaps unnatural) attachment to any form of forensic file television show and I have been known to argue the merits of various body disposal sites and methods with my critique partners.

For the record, the lovely Jennifer McQuiston recommends dumping bodies in the Virginia woods while the equally lovely Sally Kilpatrick recommends a shovel and the back forty. Personally, I’d use a metric ton of diesel fuel and a dumpster.

Barbecue anyone?

Heh. Not after that you won’t.

Aaannnyyywwwaaayyy, so, you know, my VP might’ve had a point about me being “into that stuff,” but, by now, we’re just staring at each other.

“So where do you come up with your ideas?” he asks.

I grin really wide. “Mostly in staff meetings.”

‘Cause as long as you’re going to be the weird girl no one wants to talk to, you might as well be the weird girl who gets out of that weekly torture.

As always, a big HUGE thank-you to Nikki for having me and (so I don’t feel so alone) anyone else ever confessed an uncomfortable secret?

Find Me Blurb
"Find Me." These are the words written on Tessa Waye's diary. The diary that ends up with Wick Tate. But Tessa's just been found...dead.
Wick has the right computer-hacking skills for the job, but little interest in this perverse game of hide-and-seek. Until her sister Lily is the next target. Then Griff, trailer-park boy next door and fellow hacker, shows up, intent on helping Wick.
Is a happy ending possible with the threat of Wick's deadbeat dad returning, the detective hunting him sniffing around Wick instead, and a killer taunting her at every step?
Foster child. Daughter of a felon. Loner hacker girl. Wick has a bad attitude and sarcasm to spare.
But she's going to find this killer no matter what.
Because it just got personal.

Author Bio

I graduated from Georgia State University with a Literature degree. Since then, I’ve worked as a riding instructor, cell phone salesgirl, personal assistant, groom, exercise rider, accounting assistant, and, during a very dark time, customer service rep.So don’t let anyone tell you a BA degree will keep you unemployed.